The art of living and dying.
It’s never nice to mention death. The first time someone close to me passed away was my grandmother. I was about 8. My mum was broken. It was a strange but visceral for me. Death hadn’t affected me directly up to this point. We met for the first time and it was definitely not the last.
During Covid-19 I started to read into Philosophy. Beginning with, Meditations by Marcus Aurelius and Letters of a Stoic by Seneca. It had a profound effect on me. Essentially, Stoicism is about controlling one’s life through the things that are in your power. For example**,** you want to be healthy and fit**;** you can control your diet and fitness regime in order to reach that goal. However, say you have an assignment due and you gave it in. As soon as you handed it in, the outcome is out of your control. What was in your control is already gone (the time you had doing the assignment), now you shouldn’t worry. That’s just wasted energy. The idea is to become virtuous, be rational and above all, be a good human being.
I decided that’s how I want to live. Controlling the things that are in my control and neglecting the rest. Stoicism taught me to be indifferent. I started being grateful for trivial things. Things like my sight, water, trees etc. Stuff we often overlook. It taught me not to blame anyone for any wrongdoings. It has happened, how can I solve and deal with it? One of the most important lessons is to be happy with oneself. Don’t look for happiness in fame, money or another person. Look for it within. You will be happier. It also talks about apatheia. The notion of having a balanced mind. Controlling one’s emotion. Having a sense of emotional intelligence. The idea of taking a step back and not reacting to external events but being proactive.
It also taught me to be present. We are either stuck in the past or focused on the future. What we could have done or ought to do. Stoicism teaches us that the past is gone, learn from it. The future is not promised so don’t plan too far ahead. Focus on the here and now. The tool that helps me a lot is meditating. I started with a two minute guided video and moved on to a five minute one. It helps me clear my head and really focus on myself through breathing. Making me realize that I am a living Being. You didn’t live life yesterday. You are not going to live tomorrow. You are living in this very moment reading this sentence.
Having perspective is also hugely important in stoicism. In the grand scheme of things, we all die. You are a nobody in the universe. You aren’t a needle in a haystack, you’re a needle in the Sahara desert! (if that) The world was spinning before you. It’s spinning now, and will continue to spin after you die. If we don’t mess it up that is. It made me realise that death is around the corner. The stoics proposed to live life, leaving no stone unturned, having no regrets. Follow your passion. Do what makes you happy and fulfilled.
We live till about 81. That means that if you are 25 (like me), you’ve already lived over 30% of your life. What you do is of great importance. You make your own life better or worse through your actions. I’ll tell you a secret, you control all of it! I live near a cemetery. I visit it often and I encourage you to visit your nearest cemetery. Look how many people have died. Look at how many people are dying during this pandemic. They are six feet deep and all had wishes that weren’t granted. All I am saying is this: The amount of happiness, joy, anger, money, laughter, fear, disgust and sadness you allow in your life is up to you. You are alive. You are breathing. You are Being. So Be.
